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The manager, Gary, says that Stan is too old and couldn't handle it. Back at Beebly Boop's Videogames store, Soos, Dipper, and Mabel are sitting on a bench. Seeing Reggie and his fiancée, he hides in a video game store, not wanting to be seen without a date. He then finds a video game named "Romance Academy 7," which will "virtually improve your dating skills." Although the game has received high ratings, the cashier warns that three people had returned it. In a corner, it is shown that the computer was not plugged in, yet was still able to run the game. Meanwhile, Stan is seen throwing Goldie away into the dumpster and, after an awkward parting, follows some children into Hoo-Ha Owl's Pizzamatronic Jamboree.Stan believes the arcade is some kind of nightmare. His grandmother then asks Soos to bring a date along to Reggie's engagement party.Soos says he could get a girl by the end of the week but quickly realizes that he wouldn't be able to fulfill his promise.

After some small talk, they realize that they have a lot in common. The worn-out Goldie barely manages to tip his hat before he begins screaming as his eyes pop out and oil begins spewing from his mouth, which causes the kid to run away in fear, crying. Stan declines, but accidentally slips and gets his arms caught in Goldie's mouth, causing Stan to panic and yell "Kill it! Meanwhile, Soos' attempts at getting a date by asking customers in the Mystery Shack fail spectacularly.Dipper and Mabel notice and they decide to repay Soos for all he does for them by getting him a date for his cousin's engagement party.After giving Soos fifty cents, Melody leaves but before Soos can continue to ride the train he is tackled by Mabel and Dipper. Meanwhile, Stan begins to prepare to break into the same pizzeria, putting on gloves which he calls his old friends, and saying that he has to be careful this time to avoid any more "Colombian nights." Wendy attempts to persuade him to change his mind, to no avail. Dipper reveals that they had seen the whole thing and that he had performed perfectly. GIFfany about it however, she becomes enraged saying that he's her boyfriend and no-one else's. Stan says, as he is leaving through a window, that "sometimes a man has to steal an animatronic badger," and then proceeds to fall out of the window.

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